16.9.08

Kyle Gets Abducted (12)

Kyle Gets Abducted.





"Whistle-whistle-whistle" Whistles Kyle. "It sure is a pleasant day!"


Kyle is gamboling cheerfully along the promenade on a lovely Sunday afternoon.


Kyle loves this particular Sunday particularly because the sun is shining bright, but not too bright.


Kyle hates it when the sun shines so brightly that he has to squint, but he also likes it to be fairly bright.


After taking in the all of the sunshine, Kyle feels empowered.


"Whew, I just gamboled along the whole promenade, I wonder what I should do now." Wonders Kyle aloud.


And just then, before Kyle even has time to stop wondering enough to catch his breath a large metallic object begins zooming over Kyles head!

"Oh, no! It's coming right at me! Ahhh!"Shrieks Kyle.

Kyle is being very over dramitic, seeing as though the large metallic object is nowhere near Kyle.

"Ahhh!" Shrieks Kyle a second time. "I'm going to need to move soon if I want to avoid this!"

Then, Kyle barrel-rolls out of the way of danger, and into the way of safety.

Feeling relieved, Kyle then realizes that the large metallic object was indeed nowhere near him. On the contrary, it was several hundred miles away.

Foolishly, Kyle decides to inspect the object, so he begins the long walk towards it.

After several years of trekking through the suburban wastelands, Kyle grows a beard.

"Huzzah! A beard!" Yells Kyle.

Kyle has always wanted a beard, but could never really grow one.

After several more years, Kyle arrives at the large metallic object, which is now a rusted yellowy color.

As Kyle approaches the object, Kyle notices that it has a door, and on it is a sign which reads: DO NOT ENTER !!!!

Kyle then enters immediately, because he hates being told what to do.

As he enters, he is greeted by two little midgets, who look very angry.

"WHY DID YOU ENTER?" Says the first midget.

Kyle begins to giggle, because he finds little people to be very funny.

Eventually, Kyle stops giggling long enough to form a sentence.

"I don't take orders from you, little-man. He-he"

Perplexed, the first midget then combusted into flames. Then, the second midget quickly gets a broom and sweeps up his ashes.

One the second midget is done sweeping, he returns to Kyle.

"Well I don't care! This is my space-o-ship, and I call the shots 'round here!" Bellows the angry second midget.

Kyle then rolls his eyes and picks the second midget up.

The second midget does not like this, at all.

"Hey you guy! Put me down! I may be a silly little midget, but that doesn't give you the right to just man-handle me like that!"

And on that thought, Kyle agrees. Kyle never really thought about it like that, and he begins to feel really bad about the way he treated the second midget.

"I'm sorry, little fellow, I didn't realize that what I was doing was wrong and mean, is there any way I can make amends?" Apologizes and pleads Kyle.

Just then, a creepy smirk becomes evident on the second midgets little face.

FAST-FORWARD 20 MINUTES!

"Hey, come on midget! Lemme outta dis' cage!" yells Kyle.

The second midget does nothing except push tiny buttons on a control panel.

Kyle has been trapped inside this cage for the better part of 20 minutes.

"Midget, I don't like you very much right now." says Kyle, in an attempt to hurt the midgets feelings. It works.

The midget then turns around, and with a tear in his eye says "Well, my mom died when I was little, and my dad raised me. Our situation was good and all, but I never really learned how to express my emotions. I always just kinda resorted to aggression. I guess I'm finding out that it isn't always the best solution. I'm sorry, Kyle. I'm still not letting you out though."

Kyle is getting pissed off. Kyle then decided he has had enough of these little games and he punches the metal bars of the cage he is being kept in.

"BAM!" goes the first punch, and it leaves no impression on he bars.

Kyle then decides two more punches and a roundhouse kick should do the trick.

"SOCKO!" "SMACK!" "KERPLUNK!"

As soon as his kick lands, the metal cage evaporates into a cloud of smoke.

"Ooh, spooky" marvels Kyle.

Kyle then walks over to the second midget, who didn't even noticed that Kyle had escaped.

Kyle didn't really want to have the whole "confrontation" thing, so he didn't alert the second midget of his presence. Instead, he found a piece of paper and a mechanical pencil and scribed a note for the second midget.

The note read:

"Dear angry second midget. I never liked you, but I did respect you. At least, until you put me in that cage and wouldn't let me out. Well, I got out and now I'm leaving. Have fun in here by yourself, and I hope you work out those issues with expressing your emotions,

Your best friend in the world,

Luke Skywalker (JUST KIDDING!),

Kyle.


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